Don't Let Grief Settle In

If I were to be absolutely honest, I have been grieving over the loss of numerous aspects in my life. Most recently, a friendship. When we're close to someone we expect to have them around, playing their position, being there through it all for it all. The hole that is created when, for whatever reason, they are removed from our lives can cause unthinkable pain. Right now, and for a little while now, I have been battling to regain my happiness after going through a very deep cutting loss. On my way home tonight a song came on, I thought of how things used to be, and before I knew it, I was trying to cry and drive. After pulling into the garage I couldn't even bring myself to get out of the car I felt so overwhelmed. Eventually I drug myself into the house, up the stairs, and right onto the couch preparing to stay the rest of my night there. While attempting to comfort me, my Ma said "I know this hurts, but think of all the good that will come. Think of all that you already do have."
And of course, me being true to my character, a relating biblical story came to mind.

  After learning the news that his son Joseph was dead from his others sons, Jacob completely broke down. He went into full mourning tearing his clothes and refusing to be comforted by anyone. In fact, he felt his grief was so heavy that he would mourn every single day for the rest of his life, right up to his dying day.
Jacob mourned for Joseph, thinking it was the end of all ends.

“And Jacob rent his clothes, and put sackcloth upon his loins, and mourned for his son many days;he refused to be comforted; and he said, For I will go down into the grave unto my son mourning. Thus his father wept for him” (Genesis 37:34-45).

 Even though he had over twelve other sons and at least one daughter, Jacob felt as if his life wasn't worth living anymore. He dismissed every thing he knew, stepping outside of what he knew about God, and gave up.
What he didn't know was that Joseph wasn't dead, but was actually in Egypt where the Lord was orchestrating a miracle beyond his comprehension!
Like Jacob, I discounted my many other blessings by allowing my pain to swallow my joy.
Instead of taking people up on their offers to go out, I made the choice to sit in my room alone, looking a mess.
Wallowing in my own misery.

   Looking at the story of Jacob and Joseph reminds me of how I should NOT react, but I still saw a lot of myself in his actions. When we're grieving, even when we can't see good in the future, we can't be like Jacob refusing to be comforted. We have to take comfort in knowing that God is working behind the scenes, because although we can't always see Him work, we KNOW we serve the ultimate Director! He sees not only the entire picture at our time of mourning, but He also sees the ending of each of our stories. He sees the goodness that is coming in the morning.

   From Jacobs account, we know that even through heartbreak, God is working for our good as well as His glory. While it's ok to be sad for awhile through your healing process, do not allow yourself to seep into a pit of sadness, writing off the beautiful joy filled opportunities around you.
Joy arrives in the morning :)

In Christ,
Allie J.