I just had to talk about something that has constantly been bugging me for weeks before I even made my trip out here to Denton...and that is faith.
Like I've stated before I was entirely content with my life and with that I also mean the way I was living my religion. I evangelized, studied, went to church, and everything was just so strong. There was absolutely nothing that could make my faith waiver or even make me think of my faith wavering. I'd built a nice little wall around me that instantly denied access to anything (and anyone) that came against me or my Father.
To get to that point took quite a lot of work and caused so much shifting between me and other people. Yes I understand that the road of Christianity is no where near being easy, but I did love how I finally felt like I was living right.
Now that I'm away from the ordinary I have to say that I feel like a one woman army. Not necessarily alone as in I feel as if I don't have God with me, but like me having no back-up in certain areas.
I have prayed for strength numerous times before I got here because I do not want to backslide or lose myself over the things out here in the real world. I want to stay covered. But it's so hard feeling as if I'm not "exposed"...
Maybe I'm just freaking out because the few friends I do have here aren't exactly the most religious and I'm used to be surrounded with people who love God.
All I can do is continue to pray. Pray and keep my faith strong as my will to get through college without losing the God in me.
Stormes will continue ALL of your life and you sound like you were raised up in church and that you are shielded up in God's grace, mercy, and protection. Just stay strong and know that God's got your back and that no weapon formed against you shall prosper. And, I'd be willing to bet that the very people you left behind to go to college has your back as well, you're not alone. If God's ever not with you it's because you turned your back on Him and not vise versa!Believe me, there are other christians there who feel the same way, ask God to guide you all to one another-and there you'll have your lil army! :> P.S. seek out the christian organizations!
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate to everything that you are saying Allison. It may be times where you feel yourself backsliding but just keep faith and keep praying and I will pray for you. Everything is going to be ok. Oh yeah I like how you started a blog. chrischelle
ReplyDeleteThanks a million Chelle!!
ReplyDeleteSometimes you just have to feel as though there are other people that feel just like you